So. I am pretty certain I am not the only person who has had trouble with voice recognition software. Especially when it’s the free kind that comes with Windows 7 and I have not bought special headsets/micrphones etc.
However, despite doing all the tutorials and spending aaaages reading through stuff so it got used to my way of speaking, and enunciating until I got cheeck ache – I was still having no joy.
However, after reading my novel out loud and getting fun new sentences thrown back at me (My favourite being “He bunched his thigh then punched his life.” – absolutely not a single word right, yet so amazing I may have to fit it in somewhere) I thought it would be fun to, er, ‘re-write’ some classics.
So, here is our beloved Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, according to Windows 7 voice recognition. Some bits just make no sense at all, others (mostly near the end) are pretty funny. Enjoy!
In the trees it is clear knowledge, that the man symbol, being to the ocean her own confession of a fortune, will be in want of a white collar.
However little known the feeling of such a man may be on his fisting a new neighbourhood, history is a fixing reminder that the grounding family in truth is so well fed, that he is convicted of working on art at properties of someone or other of the daughters.
‘My dear Mr. Bennett’, they had evaded him one day,’have you heard but never feel half given fifth Leicester last?’
Mr. Bennett replied that he had not.
‘At the two,’ bit empty; ’for the mythical one has just been here, and she told me all about it.’
Mr Bennet made them on her
‘do not you want to know who had taken it?’Cried his wife impatiently.
‘you want to tell me, and I have no objection to hear it.’
Bit of invitation enough.
‘why you, my dear, you must know, Mr. Blunkett said that never-failed is taken by young man. A large fortune, north of England; then he came down on Monday and at full forward by the play, and famous delighted with her be greeting Mr. Morris immediately; that he did take the question before Michael men, for some of the curtains will added in the house by the end of next week.’
‘Would that have a name? ‘
‘if he’s Marie Garfinkel?’
‘Up for! Ingle, my dear, to be sure! A single mum about 40; or I felt this year. What a fine thing felt all like hell!’
‘how so? I can expect them?’
‘mighty Mr. Bennett,’ replied his wine, ‘sucking up so tired in the nation! You must know that I’m thinking of his marriage mother.’
‘is that his fifth violin in here?’
‘Oh fifth up to the divine! I Know how can you talk so, but very likely that he may fall off of one of them, and therefore you must admit any thing you can.’
‘it now locations that. You an adult meadow, vol. viii then them buy and sell, which perhaps will still be better, Virginia Washington-any of them, but that being the might like you the best of the party.’
‘My dear, you Clapham me. I certainly have had major beauty, but I do not pretend to be anything extraordinary now. Women have five grown up daughter, she gives over thinking of hair and beauty.’
’ in that case, the woman had not offer much putative.’
‘Fact, my dear, you must indeed and been there being a when he comes in the neighbourhood.’
‘Even more than iron gate four, I assure you.’
‘that can fill your daughter. Only think we can establish than many would be fauna then. There will be emanating and they are determined to go, merely a market town, touring generally no place in the newcomer. Indeed you must go, real impossible for her to visit him, if you do not.’
‘You the people of surely. They get things moving they would be very sad to see them: and I will send a few lines by you too and up my high keeping of Marie which led to the guff; someone out there in that is aware of my little Bee.’
‘Added that it will do no such thing. The Bee is not a bit better than the others; and I am sure she has no jean, not so good as she made at the dinner. But you’re always giving her the press .’
‘They have none of the much to recommend them,’he replied; ’ they all believe it when like other girls the cliff had something more quickly than half a stone.’
‘Mr. Bennett, sucking up into her own children that awake? You take delight in vexing me. You’ve no compassion on my poor nose.’
‘you make a kidney my dear I have a high respect for your nose. Them my old friend. I have heard you mention with configuration the 20 knew that me.’
’ at! You do not know which apple Halifax are.’
‘but I hope you will get over it, and lift the many young men of 4000 who come into vinegar.’
‘it will be no use to laugh, if 20 think you will not see them.’
‘depend upon it, my dear, that when there are 20, they’ll be bed-ridden them all.’
Mr. Bennett was thank god a mixture of quick half, knock at the humour, and Caprice, that the experience of dummy and 20 years had been made in addition to make his wife and character. Her mind was less difficult to develop. She a woman of mean understanding, information, and a servant empire. When she was in contempt he had her have known that he had had a nap. The myth of her life was to get her daughter Marie; it’s solace reading and you.